Gee, wish I could say the same, but I guess somebody's got to pay for all those killer drones and non-functioning healthcare websites. And the Question of the Day: Is Bing dead? Far from it, according to a just out report from The Search Agency, which found that ad spend for the search engine spurted 60% in the first quarter of the year. Meanwhile, Mars has been renamed, and the WSJ takes a look at real-time marketing and its impact.

The agency of record is the best model, and brands who shop every last project out to the same specialty shop or the lowest bidder are doing themselves a disservice in the long run. And one CEO offers his hilarious take on why agency pitches are pure folly. Meanwhile, Doug Spong, founder and president, Carmichael Lynch Spong, wants you to know something: "In this day and age, clarity is good." And a storied shop renames itself.

Leroy & Clarkson gives the popular AMC series the "Don-O-Mite" treatment. R-rated and very funny. Meanwhile, David Murray, son of a Mad Man, writes about the era for "The Atlantic." Was there sexism? You betcha. And speaking of sexism, ad shop Marketel commissioned a study that found women are irked by the sexist tone of many ads today. Also, CP+B has named Ralph Wilson its new CCO.

The tech giant has hired Wolff Olins CEO Karl Heiselman, who once worked at Apple. The company has plans to possibly double the size of its marketing department to 600 staffers. And a math man pontificates on why Madison Avenue shouldn't be freaked out by programmatic buying. Meanwhile, Omnicom is consolidating production capabilities into a new unit call eg+ Worldwide. And there are more departures at Tribal. You'll be happy to know that the agency wishes all the departees well.

And who can blame them? If I were in their shoes I would also want complete silence on the subject. But alas (or happily, for journos with a beast to feed), the cat is out of the bag! Meanwhile, Saatchi & Saatchi has a new CCO to replace the departed Con Williamson, while Fetch has a new "Mobile Theory." And speaking of theories, Tom Martin has one. Also, Adland has another new agency -- Fred&Co.

An e-mail trail, revealed in a court fight, shows how displeased a key Apple executive was with the agency's efforts at one point, and how lame he thought the agency's response was to his concerns. The tech giant has also added four digital shops to its roster. Could there be a connection? It doesn't look good for TBWA. Meanwhile, outside of Apple's world, two Interpublic Group shops, McCann Worldgroup and Lowe and Partners made key executive appointments.

Could be just a matter of time given that the client has hired a new CMO, who the CEO lauds for his "strong focus on digital, analytics, and putting customers first." And Vegas shop SK+G Advertising has landed Adland vet Marc Lineveldt as executive creative director. Meanwhile, rumors abound that Kristen Cavallo, newly appointed president at Mullen, is shaking things up at the Boston-based agency. And Gerry Graf, founder of Barton F. Graf 9000, is very proud of the agency's oh-so-cool NY digs. He's made a video to show just how proud he is.

But it has something to do with human connection, discovery, curiosity, innovation and measurement. Whoa, I'm not sure I can handle all the differentiation I'm sensing here. Glad I'm sitting down! Meanwhile, in Rochester, NY, Partners + Napier, headed by Sharon Napier, celebrates its 10th anniversary. And Razorfish's Iain McDonald is off on an excellent new adventure while Grey London thinks it can save a bundle just by switching typefaces -- to one of its own design.

Using its Brand Asset Valuator Tool, the agency has some fun with the NCAA Basketball Tournament. Turns out neither UCONN or Kentucky wins. And Ammirati finds a new "Resource." Saatchi & Saatchi Australia shows support for the arts and Europe had its Advertising Week last week. You'll never guess which topics dominated. Actually, you will if you attended last fall's Advertising Week in New York.

The shop thinks it is "embracing the future of money," despite the fact that the virtual currency seems to be imploding. And Matthew Charlton expounds on the virtues of independence. Wow -- that Barbarian superdesk is awesome! Its designer created a similar one for Mother London in 2004. Sadly, Rosetta has cut its North American staff by 5%. And get this: the agency says the move is all about growth.